A few years ago, I transitioned from male to female during my employment at the RWE Supply & Trading.

Similar to stories of other trans people, my transition resulted after decades of suppressing my true identity. Nowadays,  it is scientifically proven that the sexual identity – like the sexual orientation – is not changeable, but deeply rooted in us. One cannot suppress that forever, but I also had enormous fears of negative consequences.

Only a private crisis led to me breaking through my suppression mechanisms: I gradually permitted myself more and more of my female identity in my private life. Some colleagues at work made comments on my new look, because my hair grew longer and longer. Once, a colleague commented humorously on some eyeliner that was left around my eyes: “Have you been to a Goth disco at the weekend?” – the stretch between personal and work life grew bigger and bigger.

I made the decision to live fully as a woman at work after numerous sleepless nights. I received a lot of support and positive reactions - I was very relieved! After a short period of time I was accepted as a female colleague appreciated as much as the male colleague they had once known me as. My private life wasn’t easy at the time and my work life was a big anchor for my mental stability. 

Suppression and hiding costs a lot of energy. I can now invest this energy in both work and private life much better.

That is why I engage in the LGBT*IQ network at RWE and want to say: You don’t have to hide! You can be who you are!